it has been a while since i last touch on this blogging land , seem like whenever I update  it will be something more emotional and something not that worth celebrating.

well, been few months into the job and yet I feel that I am not contributing much , alot of time i am just someone who is trying to keep things going. I felt like a puppet whose hands and legs are tied and been controlled by someone up there.

I guess the need of power is very great, especially for someone who has been in power for some time. I do not feel empowered, I feel like i am always instructed or if not there will always be a voice behind trying to push agenda.

I guess is time for you to let go.

Felt been cheated into this situation . . .

people give me instructions to tell me what to do, people who are totally not committed, so it ended up all on me.

guess i will be fall sick soon.

take a deep breathe . . .

love the cooling weather, all thanks to the rain the past 2 days , how is i wish the weather can always be  so cooling without the rain.

the long weekend has be good, got to rest and laze at home and did some thinking. I am not sure am I suited for my current job, just feel kind of lost, not sure where am i heading. there seem to be a lot to be done and i am still not there yet. i have been like passing each day clearing work and not much thinking into what i am doing, just trying to prevent any backlog.

發覺自己知道的事情越來越多, 但能做的事就越來越少。不！ 應該說能夠完成的事很少，很多事情并不是我們想像中的那樣。說要就有 或者說不要他就不來，很多想的 和能夠做的不能找到一個平衡點。

in less than 24 hrs time, i will be back in that 2nd class citizen room, can’t the make some improvement to it? i don’t think the CEO stepped in to have a look at the conditions.

I wonder will the H1N1 virus hit the company ?

I have around 10 people under me and is not easy to lead, instructions was given like weeks ago and people do not seem to remember or bothered to remember. Anyway from now on , I will send reminder and set my own deadline !

It’s not easy and it is the beginning .  .  .

hmm . . .let me share something happy tdy : )

Went sign up for a class with JH, just wanna try something new and try something new while my age allows me to : P I am signing up for a Hip Hop Basic lessons. Well . . .hope that it will be fun . . .

After signing up for the course went to shop around, managed to get a good bargain , if not for the sales. Guess the recession has really set in, it is so usual to see so little people in the weekends. Had some coffee too . . JH seem to be stressed by her work  , just hope for the best.

The meeting time changed 2 times . 1st changed was due to IC having something to attend to and 2nd change was due to unknown reason which i was not even been told.

1st changed, was last quite last min and i have already make an appointment according to initial time. Therefore, when i told Ic i couldn’t stay for the full duration of the meeting, the IC ignored me. Since is about work and my duty to stay so i make changes to my appointment. When i told IC i changed my appointment, IC got no reaction.

Today, after i went out to run some errand and when back in office. IC told me meeting over. I was so shocked, so angry I sort of told IC off. Keep changing and i changed my appointment due to all the changes! To my surprise @ 4pm, the time when IC say will finished the duty for the intial meeting , IC was no where to be found.

I guess IC got some other personal stuff that need some immediate attention. But to me it is so unfair and insensitive on the IC side. My other colleagues and my guess were that IC inital duty was cancel and IC do not want to stay late for meeting therefore change meeting time. But, it is totally unfair to me, when i request for early leave , IC was like saying that i am irresponsible but now IC doing the same stuff.

I wonder was it done on purpose to play me out as when I inform Ic about me changing my appointment to suit the meeting time, there was no reaction from IC side.

It not easy to work with people who mood swing so often and under control of AS.

I do not understand why someone can be control by that attention seeker.  not setting a good example, purposely ignore. Anyway no more such stuff!

I got enough !! Total act blur. . . another disappointment.

As I sit down to reflect, I finally realise who are the people who are your real friends after this event. First, I must thanks my real friend for preparing a little food for me knwoing that i will be hungry and no time for food with the running around today. THANKS my dear friend : )

The sad thing is that i learnt something new. Someone seem to purposely makes thing difficult. I was clear in my communication today but someone just act blur, I do not really understand how someone can do this to his or her own people. 

 I couldn’t understand was when someone knew the reason for having the event done in such a way, instead of explaining , he or she some how make the situation worst by adding fuel to the complaints of the unhappy people. This is disappointing !!

I am really disappointed with YOU !

Hmm . . .on a happy note : ) At least, I know who are the ones who really give all out even when people think that what we have come out with are boring and blah blah . . . .

Yes . . WE HAVE DONE A GREAT JOB !! : )

It is a real busy day even though it is a Friday, I was in office for 12 solid hours can you believe that ?!  Spolit my keep fit plan.

Nearly half the day was spent in a super duper long meeting,  4.5 hrs to be exact. I personally any meeting that is longer than 2 hrs is inefficient and normally ofr such long meetings  too much time is  spend on small little stuff which is not important at all !

But the day end with a nice little gathering with my pals @ Dome. After dinner at home, went meet my pals at Dome to rants about our 1st day of the new work year . . haha . At least the meet up, wipes away all the unhappiness of the earlier part of the day : )

Again, have been missing for quite some time. Well, guess I have nothing much to blog about but will try to make it a point to blog and reflect on daily events : )

I would say, 2008 have been a rather good year for me, not as busy as i expected it to me and there are good news from work sort of promotion but not exactly.  It is more of increase responsibilities  and a better portfolio. So 2009, will be a busy year which isn’t that bad as I am lucky in the sense that I will not as affected by the economic situations though I still have to be more careful in my spending.

Had a good rest , though my trip is not as good as I hope it to be but going on a trip does allow you to know a person better, be it good or bad

Next, my examinations results are out, didn’t do as well as before but I am still good . . .haha. 2009 will be even more challenging , adjusting to new portfolio, endless meetings plus studies.

Tmr will be the start of a new work year . . . hmm . . .what do I look forward to in this new work year ? Well, guess I hope work will be smooth going for me, a new portfolio means new challenges , just hope all will go well : )

I will do well in 2009 and so does everyone else : )

I am going to be in-charge of a department and is definitely not easy managing people and especially managing 8 people with different aspirations and issues of their own. But, i believe i am able to do it just need to go through some steep learning curve : )

For, now I am just looking forward to my coming break . . . .